Empowerment Featured

Selfie Check! How Do I Love Me?

By: Jasmine Bledsoe

We have all been through it, not knowing how to properly love ourselves. We go around telling the world “I love myself!”, all the while we secretly do not accept who we really are. But ladies, I get it. When you live in a world that does not truly appreciate the black woman, how are you to feel worth anything? We are almost always used to merely benefit others. So, how do we learn to love ourselves? I will tell you here shortly! First, I would like to tell you all why I struggled with loving myself.

Growing up I was always TOLD to love myself but I was rarely ever shown what self love was. To be quite honest, I was rarely shown what love, proper love, even looked like. So, trying to eliminate all of the toxins that I had learned became very hard and seemed almost impossible. There I was, seventeen, not knowing my old self or current self. I was trying to figure out how I could love someone that I didn’t even know.

I legitimately hated everything about me. The way I looked, my personality, my gifts and talents. I even hated the fact that I have some imperfections in my skin until I discovered how to tighten vagina. It helped me.. a lot. All because I had been brainwashed to believe that I wasn’t enough. I even went through a phase of questioning my existence. I became totally ok with never waking up again and I didn’t care who it would hurt.

I suffered with depression and anxiety all because I let life trick me into believing I wasn’t strong enough.

This went on for years, about four or five. Until one day I got tired of feeling like I was worthless. I took a step back and looked at my life. Seeing how unhappy I was because of people and situations made me wake up. Seeing that my unhappiness did not affect others was the only reassurance that I needed. If they could still live their lives and sleep well at night knowing I’m unhappy. Why would I spend my life unhappy and hating myself when they don’t even care? I also had to learn to forgive myself for mistakes that I had made. That was one of my biggest burdens but you can’t do redo’s. Why would I let the past burden me?

After this I did what I like to call a “self evaluation”. This helped me to examine myself totally; mind, body, and soul. Why was I so unhappy? What was really the root of the problem? I went through and figured out what I struggled with and then developed my “plan of change.” This step helped me to be reactive to the past and present self hate and also proactive for the obstacles I would encounter in the future. It was the only way that I would ever make the step towards changing how I felt about myself. The next thing I did was “execute” my plans. I took it upon

myself to show me love! I had to learn that if no one else loved me, I have to love me. Right now I am in the “maintenance” stage of my plan. Everyday I speak words of affirmation to myself or do something nice for me.

Today, I love me some me! Not because the world doesn’t love me, I could care less if they do. But because it is important for each of us to love who we were created to be. See, when you love yourself you are limitless. You believe in yourself, you walk with pride, you are more successful, and you are fearless. Most importantly, when you love yourself you can properly love others. Loving yourself gives you the ability to help someone else who may be struggling with loving who they are.

You become selfless when you love yourself properly. You have the power to change things when you are pure. If I had known the impact of me loving me, I would have made the transition from self hate to self love so many years ago. It is never ok to live unhappily, ladies. No matter what life has thrown at you, who doesn’t love you, who has hurt you, or how many mistakes you have made; you must let go and forgive so that you can live in love.

As promised here is how we can all learn to love ourselves:

1. Self Evaluate

The Self Evaluation should consist of you writing out a list of things that you can honestly say you do not love about yourself. Things you want to change or learn to love; mind, body, and soul.

2. Create A Plan of Change

Develop a step by step plan that is strictly about your personal growth. Use the things you wrote down in your self evaluation to build from. Make sure you make copies of your Plan of Change to put in different places as a reminder.

3. Execute Your Plan

Make it your business to consciously act on your plan DAILY! If you make it a part of your daily routine, you will get the results that you seek.

4. Maintain

Periodically go through your Self Evaluation to make sure that you are growing in love with things you may have once hated. If you keep change on your mind, you will change!

Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
Guest
jasmine
6 years 4 months ago

This was really helpful glad that helpful possibilities are here so we can use.

Guest
6 years 3 months ago

This is the most profound blog that I have read about loving self. All of the steps you mentioned are true. I self evaluate all the time. I also know when to self evaluate and get in the maintenance part. Self evaluation comes in circles. After my father passed away 8 months ago. I had to self evaluate everything! what was put in my face to deal with knock everything I once knew about myself and my life to the core. I made great strides in changing my plan. Acting on every one of them slowly. Excellent! Excellent! Excellent Blog.

Guest
2 years 8 months ago

I liked your blog so much.

I would like to thank you for the contribution.

Guest

free dating site no signup

Guest

free dating deutschland

Guest

free for dating

Guest

free asian dating sites

Guest

college dating site free

Guest

100 percent free online dating

Guest
1 year 1 month ago

keto pound cake

Guest
1 year 1 month ago

slimfast keto

Guest
1 year 1 month ago

keto deviled eggs

Guest
1 year 2 days ago

adam4adamn gay dating login https://gaychatgay.com/

Guest
1 year 1 day ago

gay glasgow dating https://gaychatrooms.org/

Guest
1 year 1 day ago

gay daddies dating https://freegaychatnew.com/

Guest
11 months 3 days ago

gay dating sim text adventure https://gayonlinedating.net/

Guest
11 months 3 days ago

top gay dating sites for iphone https://gaydatingcanada.com/

Guest
11 months 2 days ago

gay dating websites in india https://gaydatinglosangeles.com/

Guest
11 months 1 day ago

active gay dating site https://datinggayservices.com/

Guest
11 months 10 hours ago

gay speed dating math https://gay-singles-dating.com/

Guest
10 months 14 days ago
Guest
10 months 14 days ago

website to write essays https://essayghostwriter.com/

Guest
9 months 30 days ago

website that writes essays https://essaysnet.com/

Guest
9 months 30 days ago

writing descriptive essay https://essaytag.com/

Guest
9 months 30 days ago

writing personal essays https://essaypoints.com/

Guest
9 months 28 days ago

write me an essay https://online2casino.com/

Guest
9 months 27 days ago

writing argument essay https://onlinecasinos4me.com/

Guest

mobile gambeling https://casinoonlinek.com/

Guest
9 months 16 days ago

casino no deposit https://casinosonlinex.com/

Guest
9 months 15 days ago
Guest
9 months 13 days ago

self reflective essay on writing https://student-essay.com/

Guest
9 months 13 days ago

write an argumentative essay https://dollaressays.com/

Guest

how write an essay https://buy1essay.com/

Guest
9 months 12 days ago

i need help writing an essay https://essaytodo.com/

Guest
9 months 9 days ago

write my essay.com https://multiessay.com/

Guest
8 months 18 days ago

patreon adult sex games https://cybersexgames.net/

Guest
8 months 17 days ago

ben ten sex games https://sexgameszone.com/

Guest
8 months 15 days ago

sex games no download https://sex4games.com/

Guest
8 months 15 days ago

sex games with stepsis and friends https://winsexgames.com/

Guest
8 months 15 days ago

lesbian sex games anfisa333 https://sexygamess.com/

Guest
7 months 11 days ago

2discuss

Guest
7 months 9 days ago

gay dating discord https://gaypridee.com

Guest
7 months 9 days ago

bi/gay dating apps https://gay-buddies.com

Guest
7 months 9 days ago

about dating gay spanish men rtics https://gayprideusa.com

Guest
7 months 9 days ago

gay latino’s dating https://speedgaydate.com

Guest
6 months 28 days ago

old gay men video chat rooms https://bjsgaychatroom.info/

Guest
6 months 28 days ago

gay men dating site https://gaypridee.com/

Guest

gay chat tucson https://gaytgpost.com/

Guest
6 months 28 days ago

free bi gay chat sites seattle wa https://gay-buddies.com/

Guest

chubby gay dating, nyc https://speedgaydate.com/

wpDiscuz